Ever been listening intently on a person?
Most have not.
Since the verbal part of human communication is so small (between 10-20% of the information we send being face to face comes from our words (% varies depending who you ask)) most develop listening skills that uses the eyes and less so the ears.
This has a big impact on how you come across when you talk. You can prepare meticulously for your presentation or your pitch and most of us do. And then the recipient don’t even listen to our words but our body language and face expressions and eye movement.
Most of the people you meet in business uses this to read us without anything but experience to do it some are trained in this field so they are better than police interrogators in reading us.
So if you are poor in body language can you compensate for this with a better presentation?
Yes and no. A simple trick will be to seek eye contact and have a good written/visual presentation to take the heat. Try to do as little movements as possible. (I will do a body language post later on.) REMEMBER TO SMILE!
So lets concentrate on the words coming out.
Talking in positive form only is the goal or for most a vision. Trying to say everything in positive form will make you more likeable and will enhance you and your product.
All negatives will be just that. Negatives will decrease your value as well as your product/company.
Being insecure (you will automatically use more negatives when insecure) will also be revealed when speaking with belittling / weak words like :
- not – it is better to say what is than what is not. Put your statements in the positive. Even words like “never” or “nothing” are better than “not”. “Not” is fine when stating the contrary: “I like Paris, not France.”
I’m sure you get the point and click the link on “not” to read a bit more on the subject.
So how to learn how to speak in positive form? Practice on every one you meet and I do mean every one!
Go in to discussions and try to win them by just saying positive things try with your partner and friends first and when you get better use it in presentations and pitching. You should after a bit of training be able to twist anything to your advantage regardless on the subject if you manage this then you’re a pro!
After a pitch / presentation you should rewind and press play to go trough it in your head and change the parts that you could differently. If you have the luxury of having colleagues you should let them ride along with you for 2-3 meetings and have them register negative and weak words so you can get an instant feedback on this. If you work alone this will take more time to get right. You will get there and you will see a clear difference between your presentation now and then but more importantly you will see a higher closing percentage.
Stay positive and practice on everyone!